first day on my 2nd year semester 1

i got back home for hours after attended my 2nd year for my diploma this afternoon. i found myself not getting any happier than before,i didn't talk much like last time. i also found the environment is irritating and annoying. it's not as comfortable as last time anymore. i found everything is pretty boring and was wishing to get myself home as soon as possible. when i heard my public speaking lecturer said about all those preparation and deeply i already felt like OMG and stressful. how am i going to continue all this when i found so many trouble in my college? what am i suppose to do? i am not suppose to get any emotional stress because my body couldn't accept it. i'm too weak. i wish someone could talk with me about it,but nobody can. people may think i'm weird or too emotional on everything. but hey,i did not want it to happen this way too. i wish i can be even more happy or positive so that i could be more social or interesting.