Saturday, November 27, 2010

sometimes.

i'm a god damn thinker. yes, i am. i think a lot while i'm trying not to think. why is having a relationship is so troublesome? we need to pretend that we're okay while we aren't. we need to stay clam while we feel like slapping somebody. we need to stay strong while we're about to die. we need to accept things that we don't feel it's worth. we need to act like a child while we're an adult. we need to think about him/her before we think about ourselves. we need to say somethings nice while we feel like killing someone. and there's so much more. isn't this funny? is not just in a relationship we will meet such situation, this is life.


There is a "lie" in believe, "over" in lover, "end" in friend, "us" in trust, "ex" in "next" and "if" in life.



it's kinda tired. i wish a could able to sleep for a long period and wake up at the time while happiness turns out to be true. what if i can change my personality and be a totally different person. but, i guess sometimes it will not be working as fine as i think. anyway, this is a random post. i'm not emo right now.



Saturday, November 20, 2010

looking forwards for a better day

yea, looking forwards for better greater day. hopefully everything will turn out normal like a mature person do.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

i'm writing with heart

i got hell lots of thing to tell but then i found this lyric which say everything what i want to say.


On the first page of our story, the future seems so bright.
And this thing turned out so evil, I don’t know why I’m still surprised.
Even angels have their wicked schemes and you take death to new extremes.
But you’ll always be my hero, even though you lost your mind.

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn,
But that’s alright because I like the way it hurts.
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry,
But that’s alright because I love the way you lie, I love the way you lie.
I love the way you lie.

Now this gravel in our voices, glass is shattered from the fight.
In this tug of war, you’ll always win, even when I’m right.
Cause you feed me fables from your hand,
With violet words and empty threats and it’s sick that all these battles are what keeps me satisfied.

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn,
But that’s alright because I like the way it hurts.
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry,
But that’s alright because I love the way you lie, I love the way you lie.
Ohhh, I love the way you lie.

So maybe I’m a masochist
I try to run but I don’t wanna ever leave.
Til the walls are goin’ up in smoke with all our memories.

[Eminem]
This morning, you wake, a sunray hits your face
smeared makeup as we lay in the wake of destruction
hush baby, speak softly, tell me I’ll be sorry that you
pushed me into the coffee table last night so I can push you off me
try and touch me so I can scream at you not to touch me
run out the room and I’ll follow you like a lost puppy
baby, without you, I’m nothing, I’m so lost, hug me
then tell me how ugly I am, but that you’ll always love me
then after that, shove me, in the aftermath of the
destructive path that we’re on, two psychopaths but we
know that no matter how many knives we put in each other’s backs
that we’ll have each other’s backs, ’cause we’re that lucky
together, we move mountains, let’s not make mountains out of molehills,
you hit me twice, yeah, but who’s countin’
I may have hit you three times, I’m startin’ to lose count
but together, we’ll live forever, we found the youth fountain
our love is crazy, we’re nuts, but I refused counselin’
this house is too huge, if you move out I’ll burn all two thousand
square feet of it to the ground, ain’t shit you can do about it
with you I’m in my f–kin’ mind, without you, I’m out it

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn,
But that’s alright because I like the way it hurts.
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry,
But that’s alright because I love the way you lie, I love the way you lie.
Ohhh, I love the way you lie.
I love the way you lie.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Shontelle - Perfect Nightmare w/lyrics on screen HQ


Keep tellin myself that its not worth it
I already know I dont deserve it
But if its from you I dont mind hurtingt
His is my perfect nightmare
So when will I wake up and scream

this song simply just tell how i feel now.

E-VE-RY WEEK

happens in almost every week.
baby, i'm tired to be yours.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

so lost

i have no idea what happen to me nowadays.
life is getting harder and harder.
i'm tired with every thing.
i'm down with my own studies.
i'm down with my personality.
i'm down with my family.
i'm down with my feelings.

nothing seems to be good at this moment.
my laugher and smile has turn to be unreal.